Learning From Our Children

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My eleven year old daughter has had a pretty rough year as far as her friendship circle is concerned. She has had the same group of friends since she was in year 2 at school and this year everything changed. She would come home crying almost daily as she was feeling left out and ignored. She didn’t understand what she had done wrong and why her group of friends were treating her differently. It got to the point where they would talk to her when she was the only one there and once the rest of the girls turned up they would walk away from her, sometimes mid conversation. I suggested the hardest thing for her to comprehend which was to leave the group and find some new friends. She didn’t feel she was strong enough to do this until one of the girls, who was new to the group this year, told her “you are not in the group, no offence” . This was the breaking point for her and she sobbed her eyes out. Luckily one of the girls in her class that sometimes played with the group showed her what a real friend looks like and stuck by her through the next 10 weeks of hard times. My daughter has now realised that this awful painful time in her life has shown her that sometimes the things that feel like the worst times in our lives turn out to be the best. She has made so many new friends that she wouldn’t have even noticed if she stayed in the safety of her “group”. She has never know such real friendship and she has never laughed so much in her life. She even said to me the other day “I am so lucky that my group pushed me out because now I know what real friendship looks like and I have some really great new friends”. She truly is a beautiful blessed soul and I can learn so much from her everyday. I am so proud of how she has handled this situation which could have turned either way but she chose to turn it in a positive direction.

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